Published: September 08, 2008
His college experience had become exactly opposite of what he'd hoped. Initially, like most high school grads, Landen was excited about meeting new people and entering his next phase of life; but also like many high school grads, feelings of detachment were creeping in.
His college experience had become exactly opposite of what he'd hoped. Initially, like most high school grads, Landen was excited about meeting new people and entering his next phase of life; but also like many high school grads, feelings of detachment were creeping in.
In high school Landen was popular, had a serious girlfriend, was president of the Christian club, and was a very good athlete. This didn't just keep him busy; it kept him feeling good about himself, giving him a sense of identity.
Now, about five months since graduation, Landen had outgrown his high school identity. His friends went in different directions, things didn't work out with his girlfriend, he was no longer dominating in sports, and he wasn't sure about vocational pursuits. He found himself wandering through life with a flood of questions needing answers.
An Open Door
This was one of many conversations I've had in the past decade with post-high schoolers. Such conversations have kept me working with this age group. The feelings of detachment during this phase of life provide open doors for ministry like no other. This is when long-term conclusions are drawn regarding faith, life, and self. I'm thankful Landen knew I was there, having a place to seek guidance in midst of his searching.
Unfortunately not all who graduate high school find this outcome; many are left alone, not pursued by older, more mature Christians. Those who grew up in the church always knew "big church" was for "old people"-and since graduating, they don't see themselves fitting into that context. No wonder-far too few churches have any kinds of programs specifically for young adults transitioning out of high school life. More importantly it leaves far too many searching for answers outside of the Body of Christ.
Contacting Versus Connecting
Thankfully more local churches are reaching out to post-high schoolers. There are some creative ways church leaders are initiating and staying in contact with people after graduation. The following are some examples:
(1) Sending students care packages filled with things like laundry soap, roles of quarters, or baked goods; some send coffee, snacks, and candy during midterm or finals weeks.
(2) Sponsoring holiday or summer gatherings for students when they come home.
(3) Sending e-mail updates of church gatherings and news.
(4) Developing blogs on which grads can network; creating a monthly newsletter for graduates that discusses important, relevant topics.
These ideas can provide doors to ministry, communicate that we're thinking of these young people, and show we understand some things about their circumstances; but they don't necessarily connect with post-high schoolers' hearts and minds. A care package may have been nice for Landen to receive, but he needed something much deeper and substantive. He needed a spiritually mature adult consistently there, helping guide his thinking through all his questions.
The crucial transitional period following high school typically lasts from five to seven years. It often involves complex internal processes, bringing all types of questions, emotions, doubts, and concerns to the surface. That's why ministering to and standing with young adults on this journey is so important. If we're to help post-high schoolers grow into mature Christian adults, we must understand this.
In my experience, regardless of context or format of ministry, I've found at least five non-negotiable concepts we need to embrace if we are to truly connect rather than simply contact them.
The Need to Be Needed
It's easy to feel isolated and maybe even a sense of abandonment during the post-high school years. This is especially true for those who don't go away to college and experience community there and are left "alone" at their home churches, their peers having moved on. These post-high schoolers always had a place where they were part of things; then after graduation, things changed.
We don't need to have a specific reason; simply inviting them for simple things such as coffee or lunch can greatly help otherwise isolated grads stay connected. A college-age ministry can look drastically different than our traditional idea of student ministry (band, speaker, etc.)-but it must include older, mature believers who are there to pursue long-term relationships with those in this stage of life.
Recognize Their Adolescent Mindsets
The growing pressures of higher education have drastically affected the mindsets of college-age people. The increased use of technology and a results-oriented corporate worldview developed by Boomer generations has pushed post-high schoolers to obtain college educations. Employers are far more likely to hire someone with a college degree over someone with only a high school diploma.
In the 1950s some college-level education was beneficial, whereas today some doesn't really help at all. High school students recognize this, and it shows that 9 of 10 seniors expect to continue their educations by attending college. This is an all-time high in American history.
Not only are more pursuing an education, but they're also staying in school longer. Even though it many take five to seven years to complete a "four-year" degree, even after receiving a Bachelors degree, college grads still feel like they need more education. That's why nearly 40 percent of those who obtain a Bachelors degree plan to pursue a Masters degree-and nearly 30 percent plan to go even further. There are more people today between the ages of 25 to 29 still in school (13 percent of this population) than there were 18 to 24 year olds in 1950 (only 9 percent).
After serving for almost 9 years as pastor of student ministries at Cornerstone in Simi Valley, Ca., Chuck Bomar is now lead pastor of Colossae, in Portland Oregon. He’s founder of CollegeLeader and has helped over 45 churches start and develop a college-age ministry. He’s written numerous articles and is author of Foundations of College Ministry, 99 Thought’s for College-age People, and College Ministry 101 - which is due to publish spring of 2009.
Copyright © 2008 Chuck Bomar and 316 Networks. All rights reserved.